COVID SAVES POTHEAD

He was cruising down the road puffing on his pipe when he noticed a red light in his mirror.

"Oh, shit!" he thought.

He stuck the pipe in his glove compartment and waited nervously for the policeman to arrive. When he opened the window, the officer stepped back and started coughing.

"Have you been smoking marijuana?"

"No, sir."

"Please get out of the car and keep your hands on the hood."

He followed orders and stood as the policeman went through his car. 

"You lied to me. You have been smoking marijuana, haven't you?"

"I'm guilty, sir, but if the president can tell big lies to save his ass, don't I have the right to tell small ones to save mine?"

The officer inspected the pipe closely. He stared at it as if his thinking had been distracted.

"When did you buy this? It looks brand new."

"It is new. I bought it last night. With the Coronavirus turning everyone into paranoid freaks, I don't want to be sharing a joint or a pipe with anyone. I decided I needed to carry my own, so I wouldn't find myself in that predicament."

"Are other pot smokers turning to the same strategy?"

"Yes, sir. In these troubled times, we need to take precautions in every aspect of our lives."

The officer nodded his head.

"I'm in a Colorado/California frame of mind right now," chuckled the officer. "I'm going to give you a pass this time because I can appreciate good sense."

"That's very kind of you, sir."

"But I don't take kindly to individuals who don't learn a lesson and abuse their second chances. No more driving and smoking. You're still in Texas and it is my duty to enforce the state's laws. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, sir. I can take care of business before I get behind the wheel."

"I am not interested in the details of your private life. Just understand me: No driving and smoking."

"I read you loud and clear, sir."

"Have a good day, sir."

"Likewise, sir. And thank-you very much."